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When the story is agog.....

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Anger is a natural, though sometimes unwanted or irrational emotion that everybody experiences from time to time. I don't mean long term anger but the kind of anger experienced in a relationship. Anger often involves our sense of justice.

The men will say ladies are complicated. well, there are many reasons why a lady gets angry as there are so many ladies in the world. Let's consider firstly the reasons why they get angry and complicated.

  • The first category to consider is when she is being ignored or trying to get attention from the man she loves.  Ladies thrive on intimacy. She is not after the time spent with her because to her it's about the quality of time spent. Ladies are set up to receive the men they love emotionally, spiritually, mentally, and physically. However, they become bitchy,  angry and upset when they don't get the quality of time deserved. No lady wants to be in a relationship and still feel lonely.
  • The second category is being controlled.  Trust me we get angry more when the man in question is taking control of our life. A source once said "Rules without relationship create rebellion ". But hello!  that doesn't mean a man should confuse his manly needs to fix and control her need for love and care.  They're not the same thing.
  • The other most important  but common reason for ladies getting angry is jealousy.  we feel jealous because of our sense of mind  that a cherished connection we have with another person is threatened and our fear that a loved one may find someone else to replace us.  While most ladies experience jealousy on a very occasionally and mild basis, others feel it to be a pathological degree. For such extremely jealous ladies, their jealousy almost always leads to the end of their relationships.  

Other ladies gets angry due to natural hatred for the men , probably due to an offence committed such as cheating,  backsliding e. t. c.  And they really can't let go by forgiving so they heap up such hatred and get angry anytime such memories pops up. 

Having noted the reasons why we get angry at the first place,  the next is the critical truths to understand about anger...

Research has proven the link between anger and the emotional brain, with anger, blood flows to the hands, making it easier to grasp a weapon or strike at a foe, or vocally using the wrong words, heart rate increases and a rush of hormones such as adrenaline generates a pulse of energy strong enough for vigorous action. 

The truths about anger will be emphasized below:

*Anger is not caused by other people or our circumstances.  it comes out of our own hearts.  No one else can make you angry.  Circumstances don't cause your anger. If anger comes out,  it is because that is what was in your heart.

*.Anger only makes things worse in a relationship. It is not the best emotion needed when resolving issues.  It produces harsh words and that stirs up anger.  A hot tempered lady stirs up strife.

*. Anger expressed towards another person is murder of the heart. The heart is the seat of all emotions. The heart produces love,  kindness,  and other emotions.  Anger towards a person destroys every other emotions because anger builds on anger.

*.Anger is caused by our own unfulfilled desires.  what causes quarrels and fights in your relationship is it not this, that your desires are at war within you?  you desire and do not have,  so you get angry.  You covet and cannot obtain,  so you fight and quarrel.  You do not have, because you do not ask.

*.Finally, anger won't make you do the right thing. Many times we think anger motivates us to doing the right thing.  you don't call him because he offended you and you feel you are doing the right thing because you feel he deserves it and then the non calls leads to many years of no communication with the person you love and suddenly when you recover from your pride,  the relationship would have been over. 

In conclusion,  anger is an inevitable outcome in a relationship but the question is will you allow it rule over you and your relationship??

Your Friend,

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